Homecoming: An appreciation

So I was getting up to date on the New York Times Series: A Year At War and they did a video about homecoming. It was amazing to watch the video of the day my soldier came home, I personally have no pictures or videos from that day other than just as the boys were walking in.

Watching the video, which happened to follow the wife of my husband's squad leader, reminded me of how that day was for me. The video showed that the wife found her husband with ease... but that was not my experience. I remember the feeling I had when I heard they were dismissed. I didn't stand on the bleachers to scope out where my soldier was. I ran. I ran into the crowd... and then I couldn't find him. I remember the sudden urge to want to cry. That nightmare that he didn't come home.. that he wasn't there. And then I saw a familiar face and I remember frantically asking where Jeremiah was and then quickly adding "welcome home." And then Fogel found me again not long after and pointed me in the right direction. And then I saw him. I ran... no I sprinted for him. I dodged people who had already reunited. And I jumped into those arms. I wrapped my legs around him and almost knocked him over.

It is that fear that I would never see him or find him that makes me appreciate every moment with him.

I love sleeping in his arms. I love cooking dinner for him. I love being able to take care of him. I even love it when he falls asleep on the couch. These are all the little things that I would have never gotten a chance to appreciate had it not been for this deployment and that fear I would never see him again. It is a privelege to cook him dinner or sit at CQ with him. It was one of my few days off and you bet I wanted to spend it with him. I can never spend enough time with him. I am so grateful I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

I love you Jeremiah and thank you for making me the happiest woman around.

Weddings: My thoughts

So I have been married for a little over 2 months and that has given me a lot of time to think about weddings. Isn't the concept of a wedding a little wierd? I mean if you think about the origins of weddings, they started out as celebrations thrown by the family of the bride. Not to say that the bride's family doesn't pay for the wedding anymore but it is different. Back in the day it was a celebration that the family was able to find a match/a mate/a soulmate/husband for their daughter. It was the big send off to start them out right. It was a way to show off wealth. It was a way to give the young couple well wishes and a good start to their new life together. Many times a family would provide the couple with a new home or land or a business, something to start the couple out right. Many times the man was much older than the woman, but younger couples wed as well. That was also why guests would bring gifts, however it wasn't always toasters and towels.
Weddings are just wierd. Jeremiah and I planned an entire wedding and reception to celebrate our wedding. I feel like it shouldn't be the couple throwing the reception. Its like throwing your own birthday party. Gosh we could have bought all the gifts on our registry (well most of them) for the total amount we spent on our wedding. But don't get me wrong, I loved my wedding and reception and I am glad we were able to have a celebration with our families. And the other thing I find extremly wierd is the gift registries. Yes I made one, but as I told everyone it was more of a suggestion list. My favorite gifts were the ones that came from the heart that were not on the list. These include:
-Monogrammed towels
-Handmade platter and placque made by the one and only Caitlin
-The scrapbook a friend is making for me
-The cookbooks
-The water bottle with my name etched into it
-The cookie and cake mixes
And the countless other items that came from the heart.

I guess I just find weddings a little wierd, but I am glad I had one and I am glad it turned out exactly how I wanted it. It wasn't big but it wasn't small. It wasn't expensive. It was exactly how we wanted it to be. And that is how a wedding should be. It shouldn't be night that will cost you more than a down payment on a house. Your dress should never cost more than 2 months of paychecks (mine cost me $100). You shouldn't go broke and max out your credit cards just for one day. Because it is only one day that marks the start of forever. A future that you are excited for. It should reflect the life you plan to live. It should be fun and classy and reflect your personalities. Pick colors that are you, not the in colors. Pick food that makes you happy, not fancy and expensive. Pick a dj that will make you want to dance. Pick a site to have your reception that wants you to have the perfect day. Use your resources wisely and use your friends. Well don't use them, but utilize them. Most likely they will be more than happy to help out, everyone loves to be part of a wedding.

Thats my two cents, its not right or wrong, its just what I think.

Overdue

Its been almost a year since my last post on this blog. I almost deleted it and then I read my past entries and I decided it would just be wrong to delete them. They reminded me of where I have been in the last year. The trials and tribulations. The uphill journey to get here, where I am today. I started writing this 8 weeks into Jeremiah's deployment and thank god its over. It ended on March 13. 13 days later we got married. It was the happiest day of my life, still doesn't really feel like it was a little over 2 months ago. It feels forever ago. My life has just been one big blur in the last year. I did my student teaching for history last fall, one of the best experiences I have ever had. I loved my students and they taught me so much about life. Life was coming at them fast and they took it head on and still walked around with a smile on. I thought going through a deployment was hard but what these kids were going through was a million times worse. I attempted a marathon, and failed miserably. I made it to mile 19 and then sat down on a curb. I got taken to a hospital and then spent the next few months fighting with the insurance company and the hospital to get my bill paid. Never fear I got it accomplished. On December 28th Jeremiah finally came home for his r&r. :) They were two of the best weeks of my life. I spent every second I could with him, and then towards the end of our 2 weeks together we decided to get married on April 2nd. Which later changed to March 26th instead. So as soon as he left I began frantically planning this crazy thing called a wedding. It was January 14th and I had an entire wedding to plan in just over 2 months. We had a tight budget but we made it work. Being so busy with all the wedding planning helped to distract me from how much I was missing my soon-to-be husband. What also helped was that I got to talk to him almost everyday. Many days I would get up around 6 just to talk to him for a few minutes before I had to get ready for class. The day he came home was the best day of my life (well besides the wedding day!)! I had dinner with a couple of the other gfs/wives and then spent the rest of the evening with another wife. I got no sleep that night, so when he came marching in at 6 AM, I had been up for almost 24 hours. I was more tired than he was. I actually had to ask to take a nap after we got settled into his barracks room. We spent a few nights at my house with no heat and no running water. We tied up the last few loose ends for our wedding. That weekend was his bachelor party, and yes I attended... well I attended the prebachelor party, the real one came a few days later when the man in charge of the party finally got home from Afghanistan. Yeah we weren't cutting that close or anything... literally 13 days from the time Jeremiah got home to the time we tied the knot. Our wedding was wonderful. I couldn't have asked for a more special day. I really couldn't have done it without Karley, Caitlin, Lauren, Jessica, Evan, Gina, Liz, and the entire sorority for helping to pull off such an amazing event. It was definitely a day to remember. I will go into more detail about the wedding in another post. We honeymooned at Disney World which really was the perfect choice for us. It was carefree and soooo much fun! And then we returned to our regular lives... if you want to call them regular. He was still on leave so he just bummed around and enjoyed his vacation. I had to figure out how to catch up on all the classes I had missed, especially Calculus which was now extremely confusing to me. I was behind on all my research projects and I was struggling to keep my head above water. I really couldn't have done it without Jeremiah. And now here we are. I am now a college graduate, working at Walmart, and absolutely loving being a wife to Jeremiah. He just makes life fun and interesting.
Speaking of interesting... We are going for a hike to Ampersand tomorrow which is a mountain in the Adirondacks, should be fun! Well off to bed and waiting for the hubby to come home from his guard shift.