Homecoming: An appreciation

So I was getting up to date on the New York Times Series: A Year At War and they did a video about homecoming. It was amazing to watch the video of the day my soldier came home, I personally have no pictures or videos from that day other than just as the boys were walking in.

Watching the video, which happened to follow the wife of my husband's squad leader, reminded me of how that day was for me. The video showed that the wife found her husband with ease... but that was not my experience. I remember the feeling I had when I heard they were dismissed. I didn't stand on the bleachers to scope out where my soldier was. I ran. I ran into the crowd... and then I couldn't find him. I remember the sudden urge to want to cry. That nightmare that he didn't come home.. that he wasn't there. And then I saw a familiar face and I remember frantically asking where Jeremiah was and then quickly adding "welcome home." And then Fogel found me again not long after and pointed me in the right direction. And then I saw him. I ran... no I sprinted for him. I dodged people who had already reunited. And I jumped into those arms. I wrapped my legs around him and almost knocked him over.

It is that fear that I would never see him or find him that makes me appreciate every moment with him.

I love sleeping in his arms. I love cooking dinner for him. I love being able to take care of him. I even love it when he falls asleep on the couch. These are all the little things that I would have never gotten a chance to appreciate had it not been for this deployment and that fear I would never see him again. It is a privelege to cook him dinner or sit at CQ with him. It was one of my few days off and you bet I wanted to spend it with him. I can never spend enough time with him. I am so grateful I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

I love you Jeremiah and thank you for making me the happiest woman around.

Weddings: My thoughts

So I have been married for a little over 2 months and that has given me a lot of time to think about weddings. Isn't the concept of a wedding a little wierd? I mean if you think about the origins of weddings, they started out as celebrations thrown by the family of the bride. Not to say that the bride's family doesn't pay for the wedding anymore but it is different. Back in the day it was a celebration that the family was able to find a match/a mate/a soulmate/husband for their daughter. It was the big send off to start them out right. It was a way to show off wealth. It was a way to give the young couple well wishes and a good start to their new life together. Many times a family would provide the couple with a new home or land or a business, something to start the couple out right. Many times the man was much older than the woman, but younger couples wed as well. That was also why guests would bring gifts, however it wasn't always toasters and towels.
Weddings are just wierd. Jeremiah and I planned an entire wedding and reception to celebrate our wedding. I feel like it shouldn't be the couple throwing the reception. Its like throwing your own birthday party. Gosh we could have bought all the gifts on our registry (well most of them) for the total amount we spent on our wedding. But don't get me wrong, I loved my wedding and reception and I am glad we were able to have a celebration with our families. And the other thing I find extremly wierd is the gift registries. Yes I made one, but as I told everyone it was more of a suggestion list. My favorite gifts were the ones that came from the heart that were not on the list. These include:
-Monogrammed towels
-Handmade platter and placque made by the one and only Caitlin
-The scrapbook a friend is making for me
-The cookbooks
-The water bottle with my name etched into it
-The cookie and cake mixes
And the countless other items that came from the heart.

I guess I just find weddings a little wierd, but I am glad I had one and I am glad it turned out exactly how I wanted it. It wasn't big but it wasn't small. It wasn't expensive. It was exactly how we wanted it to be. And that is how a wedding should be. It shouldn't be night that will cost you more than a down payment on a house. Your dress should never cost more than 2 months of paychecks (mine cost me $100). You shouldn't go broke and max out your credit cards just for one day. Because it is only one day that marks the start of forever. A future that you are excited for. It should reflect the life you plan to live. It should be fun and classy and reflect your personalities. Pick colors that are you, not the in colors. Pick food that makes you happy, not fancy and expensive. Pick a dj that will make you want to dance. Pick a site to have your reception that wants you to have the perfect day. Use your resources wisely and use your friends. Well don't use them, but utilize them. Most likely they will be more than happy to help out, everyone loves to be part of a wedding.

Thats my two cents, its not right or wrong, its just what I think.

Overdue

Its been almost a year since my last post on this blog. I almost deleted it and then I read my past entries and I decided it would just be wrong to delete them. They reminded me of where I have been in the last year. The trials and tribulations. The uphill journey to get here, where I am today. I started writing this 8 weeks into Jeremiah's deployment and thank god its over. It ended on March 13. 13 days later we got married. It was the happiest day of my life, still doesn't really feel like it was a little over 2 months ago. It feels forever ago. My life has just been one big blur in the last year. I did my student teaching for history last fall, one of the best experiences I have ever had. I loved my students and they taught me so much about life. Life was coming at them fast and they took it head on and still walked around with a smile on. I thought going through a deployment was hard but what these kids were going through was a million times worse. I attempted a marathon, and failed miserably. I made it to mile 19 and then sat down on a curb. I got taken to a hospital and then spent the next few months fighting with the insurance company and the hospital to get my bill paid. Never fear I got it accomplished. On December 28th Jeremiah finally came home for his r&r. :) They were two of the best weeks of my life. I spent every second I could with him, and then towards the end of our 2 weeks together we decided to get married on April 2nd. Which later changed to March 26th instead. So as soon as he left I began frantically planning this crazy thing called a wedding. It was January 14th and I had an entire wedding to plan in just over 2 months. We had a tight budget but we made it work. Being so busy with all the wedding planning helped to distract me from how much I was missing my soon-to-be husband. What also helped was that I got to talk to him almost everyday. Many days I would get up around 6 just to talk to him for a few minutes before I had to get ready for class. The day he came home was the best day of my life (well besides the wedding day!)! I had dinner with a couple of the other gfs/wives and then spent the rest of the evening with another wife. I got no sleep that night, so when he came marching in at 6 AM, I had been up for almost 24 hours. I was more tired than he was. I actually had to ask to take a nap after we got settled into his barracks room. We spent a few nights at my house with no heat and no running water. We tied up the last few loose ends for our wedding. That weekend was his bachelor party, and yes I attended... well I attended the prebachelor party, the real one came a few days later when the man in charge of the party finally got home from Afghanistan. Yeah we weren't cutting that close or anything... literally 13 days from the time Jeremiah got home to the time we tied the knot. Our wedding was wonderful. I couldn't have asked for a more special day. I really couldn't have done it without Karley, Caitlin, Lauren, Jessica, Evan, Gina, Liz, and the entire sorority for helping to pull off such an amazing event. It was definitely a day to remember. I will go into more detail about the wedding in another post. We honeymooned at Disney World which really was the perfect choice for us. It was carefree and soooo much fun! And then we returned to our regular lives... if you want to call them regular. He was still on leave so he just bummed around and enjoyed his vacation. I had to figure out how to catch up on all the classes I had missed, especially Calculus which was now extremely confusing to me. I was behind on all my research projects and I was struggling to keep my head above water. I really couldn't have done it without Jeremiah. And now here we are. I am now a college graduate, working at Walmart, and absolutely loving being a wife to Jeremiah. He just makes life fun and interesting.
Speaking of interesting... We are going for a hike to Ampersand tomorrow which is a mountain in the Adirondacks, should be fun! Well off to bed and waiting for the hubby to come home from his guard shift.

Marine Corps Marathon Donations

As some of you may know, I am running in the Marine Corps Marathon on Halloween. I am raising funds to send care packages to military members currently deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan. Below is the donate button to help with my efforts. My goal is to raise $1,000

Its a snake! A big snake... no I am not kidding

So yesterday seemed like an ordinary day, babysitting, working, gonna go for a run, and then back home to take care of the pets. Babysitting was great, I made $66 in 3 hours watching 8 kids in the backyard. I didn't have to feed them or change them, just make sure no one gets hurt. It was a lot of fun and I met 8 of the greatest kids who have to deal with the most tempermental thing in the whole wide world, the Army. At least 2 of the kids were waiting for daddy to come home from Iraq any day. They were so cute and they had this chain that represented the number of days left. The mom actually said that there were 365 paper links in the beginning. I was really impressed and in awe at what these moms have to go through to get their kids through something they don't understand. These kids were 3 and 4 and they had a better understanding about deployment than most adults. I am sure they have their rough days but their mom has definitely tried to make it as easy as possible on them. These kids are used to jetsetting across the states to see family at random times of the year because thats when the Army says they can go. One family was heading to Georgia the next day and next week another family was heading to Texas. The kids waiting for daddy to come home were going to Arizona when daddy got home. The one thing you learn when dealing with the Army is:

Enjoy the time you have while you have it because you don't know what the next day will bring because the Army is in constant control of your life, even if you aren't the one who signed the contract because by marrying, dating, or being born into it you indirectly signed it too.

So then I had an hour to kill so I went home to go for a run. Well Jeremiah was online :D and so I talked him into getting on yahoo. So instead of running I sat in my house at the kitchen table yahooing him on my phone. Now I have always believed everything happens for a reason and all of this happened for a reason. If I hadn't went home and if I hadn't skipped my run to talk to Jeremiah I would have never seen the snake. All of a sudden I hear this noise like a rustling bag and I look over and its a snake going under my fridge. I freak and go running out of the house screaming. I don't like snakes and I don't mind them outside but I can't deal with them in my house. So the next hour I had my boyfriend in Afghanistan trying to explain to me that there was nothing to worry about and I should go back into the house and get ready for work and to call someone to get rid of the snake. I believe I said more than once "come home and kill it." I am sure he wished he could come home but it was definitely unfair of me to say it.

So Jeremiah because I was talking to you, you saved the day once again. You helped me to find the snake that snuck into my house that I most likely would have never found. And by the way it was a big snake... 4 feet long, not 2 feet like I said. I was not overexagerating, it was big!! Just goes to show you that everything really does happen for a reason.

Unfortunately I was an hour and a half late for work and I was so shaken up that every time I heard a noise or felt something touch me I freaked. I also fell asleep with the light on. But I did have my 2 guard dogs on either side of me and I woke up to a cat on my chest. So I would have to say it all worked out well.

On another note, Jeremiah indirectly saved the day once again. Because he is in the army and because when he deployed all of us GFs got tight, I have someone to babysit my nephew while I run my last PFT on Friday so that I can leave for OCS next Friday. But if I had never met Jeremiah and if he hadn't deployed with a certain guy I would have never met Lindsay and she would not be entertaining my nephew for 30 minutes.

Well off to my marathon of a day :)

Love Gives me hope

So I read Love Gives Me Hope all the time and I have submitted a couple but they never get approved... So this is my love gives me hope, what gets me through and gives me the hope to survive an awful day.

Jeremiah Donald Bostic gives me hope. I love you to the ends of the earth and back babe. You were my knight in shining armor on so many occassions and I know that for the rest of my life you will continue to be my knight in shining armor. You know what to say at the right moment, and you mean it. I love you for that. You believe in me when everyone else is giving up. You like the fact that I ramble on, and I love the fact that you like that. You could have any girl and you chose me, and for that I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I love you so much Jeremiah.

Lauren Marine White. Well Ethan said it best when he said your life is a train wreck... but its an inspiring train wreck. Actually what your life is is a reverse train wreck... you are a big pile of scrap metal but little by little you are regaining your old shape. Roomie you never give up and that inspires me. Your blog has taught me so much more about you that I never knew. You hide your pain and problems from me so well that I have no idea something is wrong. Never give up because your determination to succeed gives me hope and makes me never want to give up.

To the random guest at Target on Friday. His family is responsible for the climbing wall at SLU and he was a Marine. What he said to me really help me to put my priorities first.

"What are you doing working here?"

Mr. Monroe you are very right, I go to St. Lawrence University and this dead end job is only a stepping stone to my dreams... and I can't let it get in the way of my dreams.

Everyday I am amazed by people's kindness. A woman cleaned WalMart out of the $2.50 yellow, tan, and green towels to give to the returning soldiers who are single and do not even own a clean towel. You give me hope. I wish more people saw that need.

Jeremiah I miss you so much and I love you more than you will ever know. I am so glad I got to talk to you tonight but now I only miss you more and wish I could fall asleep in your arms.

Surviving on Letters

So I entitled this blog Marrying the Marine Corps, Dating the Army but I really haven't talked much about the Marine Corps side. I guess it hit me that I am 21 and I have atleast the next 6 years completely planned out and I wasn't sure I liked the direction. It was more of a panic attack because it looked like it wasn't going to work out. So I leave for OCS in 14 days and I am as nervous as hell. I am scared I am less prepared than last year. I am scared that I am going to let people down, but most importantly I am going to let myself down. Last week for the first time ever I got a perfect score on my crunches AND flexed arm hang. But my run time is still failing by 2 minutes. My last chance is next Friday and I am praying that I will make it. I need to make it. This is every hope and dream I have had for the last 2 years. This is biggest test of my life and I can not fail it, that is not an option. And honestly the only thing that might get me through this is the support of my awesome and loving boyfriend.

I feel like I survive day to day based on whether I hear from him or get a letter in the mail. I got my first two letters in the mail yesterday! They were beautiful and they hit home to say the least. He meant every word he wrote and every word touched my heart and in that instant I didn't feel alone at all. I smile, laughed, and cried all at the same time. He wiped away every doubt I have ever had in my life and I know for sure he is the one for me. It is weird because i haven't heard his voice in 3 weeks but it feels I talked to him because we talked on facebook. That little bit of contact just reassures me and gets me through the week to the weekend when I get to talk to him next.

I will say I have found the best way to distract myself... 2 jobs... at Walmart and Target. I feel like a double agent some days but then again they both run their companies so differently and I think Walmart is clearly better at it. I barely find time to do day to day chores, let alone really worry about Jeremiah. Except for when I miss his phone call because I am working... that sucks and makes me hate working so much. On the upside I am not as worried about money because I am getting 2 paychecks. I used one to pay off my credit card bill and the other I get to use to put into savings. I am also able to put more away for Jeremiah's care packages... I guess it all evens out in the end. I am just worried sometimes I am running myself into the ground for no reason but then I realize its because of so many things... #1 being Jeremiah. He is absolutely the most important thing in my life and always will be. I told his step mom about the letters and I said I felt spoiled because I got 2. She said I am spoiled because he never talks to anyone else. And I told her how awful I felt. He said it was a good thing because I am the most important thing in his life. I am just so glad that I met the man of my dreams who believes in me no matter what I do it seems. Just thinking of him makes me smile from ear to ear and he is what gets me through those hard days when I just want to quit everything... He is my rock, he is my everything, even from 6,000 miles away... I love Jeremiah Donald Bostic with all of my heart.